Broken.

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU

I miss you.

I miss the old you. I miss how you used to be. [OL]

I miss how I used to feel that there was a chance for us - a chance for me and you.

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU

Eyes don't lie. At least, those eyes I've seen never did.

Usually, I can tell when people are really in love, or at least happy in the relationship they are in. Because eyes don't lie. You see, when people are in love, there's a spark in their eyes. Their eyes glow. And even if they try to hide it, the happiness just shows.

[Just this Sunday one of my friends proved me right, again. Her eyes were smiling and glowing. There was no way to hide how happy she was. Hehehe.] :-)

And this brings me back to the point of this post.

I want to tell you, I don't see the spark in your eyes. And so far, no one does (at least, none of the people I know). And it's sad, because you've waited so long to finally be with someone, that it would be a sin to get stuck in a relationship with someone you only think you are in love with, when you could be out there with the person you are meant to be happy with.

Some times, some people just want to be with someone so bad, they stop really caring who the person they are with is. Just like how some times, some people want to fall in love so bad, they end up convincing theirselves they are in love even if they're not. They don't realize that most of the time, they are just in love with the idea of being in love, and then they miss out on all the best part and things of really being in love with your partner.

Please, don't spend your time being with someone you are not in love with, and who is not in love with you, either. Don't spend your time with someone you don't see yourself starting a family, waking up, sleeping, and spending the rest of your life with. It's not worth it, because you could, and should, be spending your time with the person you are meant to be with.

The rest of your life starts the moment you realize and feel who you are meant to be with. Start the rest of your life as soon as you can. Make it happen. Don't be trapped.

We don't think you're happy, and we want you to be. I want you to be happy.


But then again, who am I to know.

Labels: Buhay ng may Buhay, doing it the soap-opera way, I'm thinking of YOU, That's Amore

I just finished reading one of my Facebook friends' status.

Tumagos. Hahaha.
I won't say which one, 'cause it'll be too obvious. Ayoko ng gulo. Hehehe.

Anyway, while I still wait for us to happen, and be finally together...

Can I just ask you...

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU, That's Amore, Wishing on a falling star

The last couple of months have been unbelievable.
I finally decided to move out. I moved not just to a different city, but a different country. It's not a strange country 'cause I did stay here for, more or less, 10 years, so it's not as difficult as one may think. And it's not like I'm totally living on my own, since (most probably) more than half of what I'm spending comes from my financier, the Mother Goose. :-P But you get the idea. So far, so good. And I am proud to announce that both Andi and I are still alive. Hehehe.

_______________

I'm putting the Project 365 on hold, because the last few months of transition didn't give me enough time to take a picture every single day. Just so you know, I plan to restart on my 27th birthday. [When I feel like I'll feel (paulit-ulit? Hehehe.] so grown up! Hahaha.)

I missed blogging, I miss my MAC, I missed Twitter, I miss my Canon, I miss fast internet and painless router... I miss Milano [and everyone (and everthing) in it], and I miss you (you probably don't care, but, yes, I do miss you.) - so near, yet so far lang ang drama. Hahaha.

I have at least a year to see how things will turn out 'till I have to make another decision. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Wish me luck. Keep me in your heart. And pray for me.

Labels: Andi, Famiglia, I love Milano, I'm thinking of YOU, Mabuhay Pilipinas, Project 365, Si Dindin

It rained today. I swear the rain knows exactly when I need it.

Thank you, Pà! And thank you, Lord!
I feel a bit better, and so much calmer.

Labels: doing it the soap-opera way, Famiglia, I'm thinking of YOU, Si Dindin, That's Amore

I think I just found the perfect song to describe what I feel.

I tell you, sometimes, everything seems to be so weird. I was waiting in line to pay for my lunch when the girl next to me decided to take off her headphones and let her iPod's speaker do the singing.

Para lang akong sinapok.


I wrote some of the words I could remember as soon as I sat down, because I knew that I just had to look it up on YouTube when I'm home.

Labels: I love Milano, I'm thinking of YOU, Silly Me, That's Amore

Sometimes I can be so happy that I want to cry.
Like right now.
I am honestly, sincerely, wholeheartedly happy for you.
Seriously.

But, yes, I must admit, my heart feels terribly, terribly heavy.


Okei, night-night. I'll go cry myself to sleep now.

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU, That's Amore

No, seriously. How?

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU, My One-liner

I looked at the words.
I stared at them.
I stared hard. I stared as if I wanted those words scratched off. I stared at those words the way I stared at your face. The way I used to, yes, I used to stare at your face.
The intensity, the fire, the hurt.

The incertainty of it all has evolved into something certain.
The Certainty, the Truth, the Love.
Your happiness, my calmness.

Love has come for you, embrace it with all you've got. Pain came and touched me; I shall brace myself. I will cry, I will dwell, I will weep.
But I am not saddened, no I am not. I feel no hatred. I feel calmness, contentment, for love has come and touched you.

I wish you well. I wish the sun would shine brightly for you. I wish the stars would twinkle and make you see every thing as magical as it really is. The breeze will never be too cold, unless your heart desires it. I wish you well, with all of my heart, and with all that I am. Love has come for you to embrace, and it is yours to keep. I wish you love that gets stronger each day. I wish you contentment. I wish you happiness. Oh yes, I wish you well.

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU, That's Amore

I looked and read through the words, over and over, and over again. And every time it felt like a deep stab in my heart, right where it hurts the most.
I closed my eyes.
And again, once more, this time, I say to myself, for the last time, I took a glimpse.
The words. I am weakened. I feel like I am drowning.
This can't be. This can't be real. This feels like going against Fate, fighting with Destiny. Sacrilege!
I am on the verge of having my heart broken. This time, for real. Into million tiny pieces.
Don't let it be.

The cold breeze, the million stars, the ray of the moon feels warm as it touches my face, and my dearly loved beast, are the only comfort I can find. Surreal but they keep me warm inside, they keep me warm where it matters, in my heart.

The thought of you with someone else makes me weak.

A tear. The thought. The devastation. The truth.
But I'm holding on. I refuse to let go. For a string of hope, is still hope, after all.

I wish I could easily shut you out of my life, but I can't bear the thought of it.
And who am I to blame you? For wanting happiness in your life, for being brave enough to look for it, and embrace it when it touched you.
I was a coward. And I am a coward. And I fear that you'll never know how you make me feel.

Just once, I wish you could look through my eyes, and feel through my heart, so you'll know what you mean to me. Just this once, for once will be more than I could ever ask for, for once is all you need to feel how wonderful of a gift you are to everyone in your life.

The words of incertainty haunts me through the day. I am weakened.

I feel that I should let this be known, that as weird as it may sound, I am not saddened. Deep down in my heart, the thought of you being happy with some one who is not me makes me weak, but I am sincerely happy for your happiness.
Your happiness calms me.

I want to share my life with you. I want to share my happiness with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
For this time, the uncertainty doesn't kill me. It gives me a pinch of hope to hold on to. So, I am holding on. I am not letting go... Just not yet.

I still believe in you and me. I still believe in us. I still believe in us together, forever. I still believe we are meant to be.

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU, That's Amore

Tonight, while walking Andi, a plane passed by. Funny how of all the people I know, you came to mind.

Labels: I'm thinking of YOU, My One-liner